The Back Up Plan

An update on the job front:

Well, friends. Not that it matters, but I think I’m going to pull my application off the web for a teaching job this fall. This would be crazy if they were, in fact, offering jobs. I had a rough day this week with Ava and it was a real eye-opening experience for me. The past 3, almost 4 weeks I’ve spent alone with Ava while Curt is in Las Vegas and while she’s easy and basically trouble free, doing it alone is hard. There, I said it. I’m not Wonder Woman. And while I’m just letting it all out, the past 2.5 years of her life have been a roller coaster of ups and downs. Some days I can do it all and others, well, let’s just say showers and teeth brushing are considered personal triumphs in my list of things I accomplished each day. Between deployments, Weapons School, and the 14+ hour days Curt puts into work, I’m just exhausted in every sense of the word.

So, while I feel like a massive failure who has given up, I need to just put that part of my life behind me, and move on. I’m so envious of all the military spouses out there who manage a career and a young kid at home...all while their husband is away. YOU are Super Woman.

Honestly, I’ve been losing sleep over what is to come over the next year for our family. I don’t have a crystal ball but it looks like a big move and, god-willing, another baby for our family. With so many changes happening, I need to just back off the quest to find the perfect job and know that someday in the future, I’ll be back where to work. Some days, I regret not getting right back to work once we moved to North Carolina and at the same time, I know deep down inside if I did spend the past 1.5 years working, I’d regret not spending that time with Ava and our family here in Pennsylvania. Is the grass ever greener?

I have a few back up plans that might work well to satiate my need to be with Ava and work at the same time. I might see if I could be an aide in a preschool that she attends. I might also see if I could work as an aide in an elementary school. While my degree and experience says I can and have handled much more, it would be so nice to know that my work starts in the classroom and ENDS in the classroom. No grading, no planning, no meetings, no extra duties... You get the idea. Of course my inner control freak will be bouncing off the walls when things aren’t being done the way I would do them, but I’d be working. See friends, it’s all about compromise.

Does any of this make sense?

The good news is that my amazingly supportive husband is happy with whatever I choose. If I want to sit on my butt and send Ava to preschool each day while I eat bon-bons on the couch and watch Bravo, he’d say, “Do what makes you happy!”. (Note: that won’t make me happy, but you get the idea...) Might I add that it’s a wonderful thing that I have the choice to work or not to work. (Although, I do remember the days of living in England with dual incomes and COLA. AKA: The Glory Days.) Our financial security is thanks to the hard work Curt puts into his job each and every day. The Air Force has been so great to our family and for that, I’m very thankful. We have a (brand new) roof over our heads, food on the table, clothes on our backs, and a Chanel bag in my closet. Amen.

So, the job hunt, I think?, continues. I will keep you posted on what lies ahead.

Military friends: Do you ever find yourself in situations like these? I feel like some days I’m in a war with myself over what I need to do!

Life

Okay, readers. Let’s see how much I can update you all on throughout the day. I think this goes without saying, but Ava takes up quite a bit of my free time and it’s getting harder and harder to sit down and write these days. Especially when Curt is gone for weeks at a time.

So, let’s start with Curt. He’s off in Vegas and has been for the past 3 weeks or so. He’s training and whatnot but will be home again this coming weekend. Can I get a “Amen”? Ava and I spent the last 2 weeks in PA and we too are headed south come Sunday. I love being near family and someday, we’ll be back permanently. However, I do miss my house, my bed, my stuff...you get the idea. I almost feel like a nomad when we trek back and forth as often as we do. Packing gets old and unpacking, even worse. I’ve been known to have staring contests with unpacked suitcases on my bedroom floor for up to two weeks. I know, I hang my head in shame. Life is good for Curt. He really and truly enjoys what he does and I guess that makes this crazy life we lead all worth it at the end of the day. I will be interesting to see what the future holds for the D family. He seems to think we’re off to Vegas next, maybe in as little as a year, and if that’s the case, I can be happy with that move. We have our closest friends already there, the Yule’s and the Madsen’s, and it will be a short time away from things like Deployments and crazy work schedules. With our FOURTH deployment approaching, this one being the longest, I can honestly say it will be nice to know that Curt will be staying put for a couple years. But, as the military as taught me in the past, it’s never a good idea to get your mind set on something, as it’s more than likely going to change in one way or another. In the meantime, we will get ourselves mentally, physically, and emotionally prepared for the big D coming up in the near future. Here were go, again.

As for me? Well, here’s the latest on the job front. NOTHIN’. That’s right! I’ve done all but stalk prospective schools in the county in the hopes of landing myself a job but due to the wonderful world of job cuts in education, things are looking grim. How did this happen? How did I go from being a well respected, in demand, employable person? HOW? Hmmm, I think my brief hiatus from the classroom is coming back to haunt me. I heard from a few schools that I really need to be a substitute and keep a high profile. To that I say, heck to the NO. I would never put Ava in daycare full time just because I may be working that day. My ability to up and go, like I did when we were living in England, is long since gone. The good news is this: if I don’t find full time work for the coming school year, my Masters degree will finally be completed. I guess all we can do now, is wait.

In less than exciting news I did manage to take a trip to Urgent Care this trip, as we always do when we’re here, and then for an emergency ultrasound. Long story short, I was experiencing some pain and spotting midway through my cycle even though it was physically impossible for me to be pregs. Don’t worry, the docs asked me about a thousand times for they initially thought I was miscarrying. Turns out I had a cyst on my ovary burst and hemorrhage. FUN! I’m relieved with the results, considering the fact that they sent me in looking for “growths or masses” in my baby making regions. Lord, that was a stressful couple of days. I’m very thankful it wasn’t anything too serious.

Moving on...

What’s new with Ava? Well, if you follow me on FaceBook, I do my best to keep the videos posted as often as possible. FB has seriously been a blessing for my family. No matter where we are, Curt and anyone else who hasn’t seen Ava in a while can watch a little clip of her and her madness and feel like they were right there with us. (Kinda.) She’s happy, healthy, energetic, SMART, and constantly on the go. She learned to ride the tricycle my mom and dad gave her while we were here the past couple weeks. She was really unimpressed with the helmut but once she realized that one doesn’t go without the other, she decided this big and clunky hat on her head wasn’t too bad after all. She misses Curt something awful and asks to go “back to Ava’s house” to see him on a daily basis. It’s really heartbreaking. I can’t even imagine what it’s going to be like when he leaves in the fall.

Ava’s also getting ready to be a flower girl for the second time in her Aunt Angela’s wedding to Waaaarrrreen next month. Yes, she still loves Warren, a lot. She’s so stinkin’ shy around him it’s ridiculous. Boy crazy at 2? God help me.

We’re taking the summer off from preschool and she’ll start again in the fall. I’ll keep here there part time even if I’m not working. That small amount of alone time is worth ever cent I spend to keep her there for the morning. She really enjoys it there so that makes me feel good when I drop her off. She still talks about the friends she made, especially the BOYS she likes. (Fo’real?!?).

Here are a few Ava-ism’s we’ve heard over the past couple weeks:

“Hey Poppy, you want to come over here and hang with me?”

“Maggie! You’re being a knucklehead!” (Maggie is our family golden retriever and the word knucklehead is a lovely word she got from my dad. Hey, it could be worse!)

“Where we goin’ today? The mall?” (Oops.)

Me: "Ava, come over to the table so you can eat your lunch."

Ava: "What? What are you sayin?"

"Hey Mommy, where’s my purse?”

Oh, Ava. How you keep me on my toes! She’s still singing and dancing non-stop. She loves way more country and hip-hop tunes than she does Barney or any other age appropriate music, for that matter. I sent Curt a picture of her the other day and his response was, “Does she start college next week?”, as he was blown away by how after not seeing her for 2 weeks she had grown so much. We’re approaching the big “3” and she seems more and more like a teenager with each passing day. I think it’s safe to say she’s growing up too fast and hopefully another Dougherty baby will make it’s way into our family so we can do it all over again from scratch. Ava would be an amazing big sister!!!!

Stay tuned, a pictures post is up next!

Summer Wedding

I’m going to try and squeeze in a few posts here and there this week to try and catch up on all that’s been going on with everyone. I’ve been in Pennsylvania for the past couple weeks so it’s been slightly hectic.

Starting off my random spattering of posts is a picture of the dress I just bought for my friend Erin’s wedding this coming weekend. I just love when friends from high school tie the knot. It’s such a great way for me to see a lot of people at once AND celebrate the marriage of a wonderful friend! Win.

So, I picked this beauty up from Nordstrom yesterday. The only problem was that it’s a little big in the bust (shocker...) and a little long in the length (again, shocker!). I took it to our handy tailor last night and he promises to make it perfect by Friday morning.

T Tahari “Lauren” Dress (via Nordstrom)

Kate Spade “Tisbury” clutch

In my oh-so-awesome planning ahead skills, I managed to bring home my Kate Spade Tisbury clutch in gold (see above...) and I think it’s going to be a perfect match. I’m on the hunt for some new shoes today, YAY!, and they most likely will be in the gold family as well. Jewelry is to be decided. With the dresses neckline, I won’t need a necklace so perhaps some gold bangles? Decisions, decisions...

I had originally planned to get a blowout in between the ceremony and the reception because there is a 4 hour gap of time between one event and the other. I’m not completely sold on how my hair will be, but, it’s between these two inspirations. Are they ever wrong in their beauty choices? Never!

A loose updo, like Rachel Bilson:

Or a wavy blowout, like Jessica Biel:

Those who know me, know I’m a little crazy when it comes to taking pictures. I promise I’ll get a couple pictures of my final look. I really wish Curt were here with me but he’s still out in Las Vegas working and lucky for him, he will be there for our future-brother-in-laws big bachelor party. More on what Curt’s been up to lately in a different post!

Happy First Day Of Summer!

May?

How did I miss the entire month of May? Yikes, Maureen.

Clearly we have some updates! Family related. Shopping related. You know how I do...

Hoping to squeeze in a quick post when Ava naps today.

Check back tonight!

MORE SHOES?

Yes. More shoes.

I've been on the prowl for some seriously cute and QUALITY cowboy boots for...well...ever. Friends, I think I've found THE pair.

Behold: The Frye Billy Vintage Boot (in Tan).

You see. I need these boots to wear with my shorts when I'm hitting up all the country concerts we're planning on going to this summer! (I'm actually serious... You're in the south, now!) Also, see this outfit Ms. Simpson is wearing? I definitely bought a shirt from F21 last week that is similar to the one she's wearing. I'm not afraid to admit my Jessica-inspired inspiration! Check out my previous post!)

And we have Carrie. Flawless, as always. All I need here is amazing legs and I'll be set! Excuse me while I do about 1,000+ squats.

BUT. Back to the point.

You may have remember that I blogged about some Frye boots around Christmas '09 and I have to say, this brand is still worth every penny. Comfortable, buttery soft leather is what makes Frye boots, AND SANDALS, so irresistible. I still love each and every pair that's sitting in my closet. (4 and counting...)

Not sure what Curt has planned for Mother's Day but you can be sure I'll be planting a few seeds here and there. No worries, he likes the help.

"Happy Wife, Happy Life!"

Just for fun, here's the Frye collection I have in the closet so far. Timeless as far as I'm concerned!

A White Moment

Evidently I'm obsessed with all things white lately. Check out the loot I just picked up (well, ordered online...) from the oh-so-budget-friendly, Forever 21.

Happy Spring!

Yes. I know this is grey. BUT. I never turn down much of anything in a heather grey.

On The Radar

So, this must be a North Carolina thing? Or, maybe just a southern thing? Either way. I'm jumping on the "Boat Shoes" bandwagon.

I think I need a pair of Sperry Top Siders in my closet. I'm seriously due for a new pair of flats. My poor Tory Burch Revas are getting a tad too much wear lately. Plus, I try to save the leather flats for pretty much any season other than summer.

I think this pair might be the winner in my search for new shoes. The "Angelfish" in pink, naturally. I would probably wear them with my cropped boyfriend jeans and even some shorts when it's really warm enough. It must be the eternal prepster in me to love these shoes.

Time to buy!